To the people who keep giving me advice, thank you. But what I don't understand is, you guys keep telling me to do things that (supposedly) won't hurt me.
I wonder how that feels. I wonder how much hurt I can take in.
If you look at it from my perspective, your curiosity would act up real bad because you don't have "first hand experience". How would I learn if I haven't experienced it yet? I will remain oblivious to the truth. I will forever be prejudiced by my own friends'/family's opinions. How will I learn to trust my own instincts.
I know getting hurt is not exactly something to look forward to, or something I should be happy about. I just want to learn. I want to feel it for myself. Call me a sadist, but, i'd rather hurt than be numb forever.
And what happens if I get hurt for real after being sheltered from everything? Won't that be worse?
I don't fucking know. Whatever. Fuck this.
Should I keep going and find out my limits? Or should I just stop because everyone says so?
Ugh, talk about peer pressure. HAHA.
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