I almost smoked weed on my first day in college.

LOL. Did that scare you? Or did you actually think i'd do it?

I mean, it's just weed and I'd only get high, have brain damage, and possibly give in to sex, but it's still marijuana and it's illegal. HAHA.

How did I get into that situation?
Well, this bitch (former roommate of my current roommates) who I didn't know barged inside our room here in the dorm and asked if I wanted to go with them to some place. It was really boring in the dorm and I was alone so I agreed to go with her. Stupid me.

Boom. I'm not going to mention the name of the place, but the people there.. DAFUQ. Tangina magkakalapit lang kayo, DI NIYO KAILANGAN SUMIGAW =)) Everybody was "feeling cool" and apparently, all of the people there know "everybody who's somebody".

Imagine a scene from a movie where there's a party in a frat house. People were making out on every single surface they see, beer, kissing, screaming curses, more beer, more kissing.. Yadda yadda. It's all so.. American but in a more "pussy shit" sense because, well, we're not American, nor are we in America.

SO BASICALLY, it's not my scene, and it's not my idea of "fun". I mean, I was just standing there being my silent self, saying hi to anyone they introduce to me.

AFTER THAT hell hole I was in for more than an hour, we finally went back to the dorm. We hung out at that bitch's room for a while and let me tell you, listening to their conversations made my brain cells deplete a bajillion times faster than me doing absolutely nothing for the past few months before school started.

Disclaimer: I am not exaggerating in any way. This is the only conversaton I remembered because it was THE MOST fucking pointless thing i've ever heard in my whole life. It was worse than my dad asking me why I want to eat fruits.

Sample Conversation: (please imagine a high-pitched slutty conyo-bitch voice)
Girl 1: OH MY GOD HAHAHAHA I MADE KWENTO TO *THIS GUY* THEN I WAS LIKE OMGGG!!! *insert stupid face here*
Girl 2: OMG HAHA THEN WHAT DID HE SAY?!
G1: HE LIKE UM.. HE MADE-GAYA ME THEN HE WAS LIKE OMGGG TOO!!
G2: OMGGG!!! HAHAHAHAAH

Then they asked me "do you smoke?"

I was like.. DING DING DING. Okay I know where the fuck this is going haha I'm not stupid.

She rang someone up (a guy) and spoke Ilonggo, which I understood pretty well.
"Meron ka pa jan?"
"Pahingi. Meet tayo sa 7th floor elevator." (because boys aren't allowed to go to where the girls are here in the dorm)

HAHAHA SHADY AS FUCK. NOBODY WILL THINK YOU BITCHES ARE UP TO SOMETHING. NOBODY. REALLY. YOU CAN'T FOOL ANYBODY. NOT EVEN GOD. REALLY. NO.

I'm not one to give in to peer pressure, so I thought of a really lame plan to get out of there.

When we were about to pick up "that something", I stayed inside the elevator and told them I was going to sleep, and pressed "3" (because I was in the 3rd floor).

PEOPLE OF THE UNIVERSE. THIS HAPPENED AT AROUND 9:30 PM.

YA'LL KNOW I'M TALKING SOME REAL REAL BIG-ASS BULLSHIT HERE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAAAAAY.
Well that was an eventful night, eh?

These bitches won't get off my ass though. As in, they're all clingy and shit and I just want to slap their fucking faces so hard, their heads will make a faster revolution than Mercury.

Am I a nerd or what? :D Just kidding. I'm not a nerd.

Lame, lame, lame.

Please bear with me because.. I don't know what to do or how to avoid them. Apparently, if I act like a total bitch, THEY'RE ATTRACTED TO THAT. THEY THINK I'M COOL ENOUGH TO SMOKE WEED WITH THEM. Please help me. HAHAHA. I've encountered people like them before, and I don't want to go back to my "dark days" which aren't as dark compared to some people, but I changed a lot during that period in my life, so.. I don't want that to happen to me again.

What the fuck is happening to humanity ;___;